


Hollow Ichigo x Reader - Beneath the Reign

by KittenTalesAuthor



Category: Bleach
Genre: Corruption, F/M, Innocence, One-Shot, One-Sided Attraction, Oneshot, XReader, king and his horse, light and dark, possessive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2018-08-07 19:01:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7726072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittenTalesAuthor/pseuds/KittenTalesAuthor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone knows Ichigo Kurosaki isn't the type to get his loved ones wrapped up in his problems. He does everything he can to keep his friends and family at bay as he tries to fight his own battles and inner demons, but sometimes, that isn't so easy. With his inner hollow beginning to gain more power within himself, the teetering balance for the right of King becomes more dangerous, leaving Kurosaki in an especially vulnerable position. Normally, he would always find a way to fight back the hollow within to keep him beneath his reign, but the thing is, _______ is getting involved now, too. Being a regular Human without the gifts her shinigami companion has, she is blissfully unaware of the world filled with spirits and hollows which surrounds her - for now. Deep inside, the hollow has come to notice something. _______'s spirit energy has been slowly increasing, slowly getting closer and closer to grant her the ability of sight. It wasn't much and it certainly wasn't close enough to be like Ichigo and the others, but it was just the right amount for him to make his move. Once he's out and has gained the crown, there will be no escape.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beneath the Reign

_Looking up into a sky that stretched on endlessly beyond the capabilities the eye withheld, a sketch stood in thought. Was that the right word for him? He had been struggling to find the correct term to define just what he is, **who** he is, but nothing ever seemed to feel right. He had been an enigma before, a shadow, a doppelganger and a sketch, but nothing ever stuck for very long. The only term that ever remained in its place for him was **horse**. Would it ever change? Would the positions of power ever flip to grant this phantom life? All of those on the other side of this boy’s head thought of him in the worst of light and they all had the definite right and reasons to. He would never deny it because he knew inside of himself that if he ever gained control, the world would fall in fire and ash, but deep down, he felt like there was always something missing._

_Was ‘phantom’ the right word for him? A ghostly image without any form of physical existence in the world? He wasn’t too sure. He was a hollow, a strange defective spirit of some kind, a rarity of his own, but that word ‘phantom’ felt much fuller than what he did. A phantom was a ghost, a true spirit, an apparition. He was a hollow, yes, but where there are spirits there was once life. A life that may have been good or bad, but it was a life. What kind of life did he have to warrant for when all he knew and all he had seen were the endless skylines and ongoing horizons? Many a time he had been bestowed the name ‘Zangetsu’ – he had even come to call himself that in the past as well from previous switching of powers! Yet, he knew this wasn’t the way it was. He wasn’t Zangetsu even if both of them were the manifestations of the abilities held within this body of flesh and bone. Zangetsu was an entity of his own no matter what kind of powers they shared that resided in this same endless nightmare, this same limitless prison, but he had an **escape**._

_Zangetsu held meaning and purpose. Zangetsu withheld a presence in the world beyond the boy’s mind. He held within his grasp a **life**. It wasn’t a normal one, wasn’t one of walking and stretching limbs on the outside whenever he very well saw fit, but he still existed and he still mattered. If Zangetsu was stuck in this hell with him, how could he hold such importance and life on the other side while he remained beneath the King’s reign? No, he wasn’t a phantom. A phantom held more meaning than he did. Delving deeper into his thoughts, he almost began to believe that he was simply nothing. Maybe that would explain things a lot easier than he could think up on his own. Though he had nearly taken control of his host on several occasions, he was still just an inkling within the reserves of his mind. Was he just a distant memory destined to fade away and disappear for the rest of time? He highly doubted the King would blow away the dust from his book’s cover no matter what the circumstance may be for more than the use of his own abilities in battle._

_Laying in a limitless world such as his own often brought him across these many bridges in his thoughts. It wasn’t a lie when people said it’s scary to be alone with your thoughts in the dark, but his world was more often than not filled with light. It was constantly blue skies with a few drifting clouds, so why did the thoughts remain? Maybe he took things too literally. Maybe he really didn’t understand what it was like on the other side. Maybe he really wasn’t meant to be King. He and the boy would always be one, would always be the same person with separate embodiments, so what the boy experienced, he did as well. He had seen the world through the boy’s eyes, had heard the voices and laughter for himself, but he had never been able to feel anything. It was a sad existence for him to lay dormant within this unsettling silence, a forgotten work of art left in a room to rot and decay. He withheld no color like his counterpart did, withheld no sort of light nor legitimate warmth. There was always a difference between the warmth a regular person emitted from their natural body heat and the warmth felt from the special ones without needing to touch them. It was almost like a spiritual energy on its own, but he didn’t have that. Looking down at his pale hands, he knew he never would._

_Maybe it was best for him to stay here. Maybe this is just where the colorless and the hollow are meant to rot. Yet, he was the only one here with this such fate. Maybe all others like him held their own fates in different worlds of their own where they all lost their sanity just as he had so many years ago. He had watched it all but slip out of his grasp, the soft, loose threads of silk like fluid thoughts uncoiling from the tips of his fingers to disappear in an invisible mist. All of which remained in its place was a broken mind with bustling thoughts that refused to let him rest. Laying back against the building’s surface, the colorless boy took a quiet breath, dulled golden hues set directly above him. Maybe he wasn’t meant to find out who he was. Maybe he wasn’t meant to be his own person. Maybe he wasn’t meant to have a life like those on the other side did._

_Maybe he was always destined to be the nameless horse beneath his King._

_He had almost let himself believe that. He, for everything in him that let him be, nearly let everything go to fully allow his decay, but something always seemed to stop him from doing so. The sound always came to him during his lowest moments just like this. That gentle, soft, sweet and joyful laughter…It sounded nothing like his own. Maybe because who owned such a voice was filled with that kind of bright life he could only dream about while he was filled with a cynical level of pure insanity. He knew right off the bat who it was, who the boy was speaking to again, but he refrained from looking to see. He didn’t need to. Humans meant nothing and would always mean nothing…He scowled at the thought because he knew. He knew even as the very contemptuously uttered words left his lips that he couldn’t hold true adamancy in his stance against this one particular Human. She was…peculiar. He had started to pick up on it a long time ago, had noticed that she withheld just a little more spirit energy than the regular Humans did. Over the years, he had watched it slowly grow and grow until he swore she would soon be able to open her eyes and take in the true horrors the world around her had to offer with a new sense of sight. Spirits and hollows alike would make their presence known to her with the glance of her eyes and there would be nothing she could ever do to stop it._

_He had never shown much interest in any of the other side’s Humans before other than those of the boy’s friends who he just sought out to destroy to make his life hell, but this one…There was just something about this one that made him rethink his steps. She was so…innocent and warmhearted. There was a sense of childlike wonder which surrounded her very being, a sweet and pure aura which he could almost feel resonate within his person even from within his prison. He brought a hand up to his chest and gripped onto the white cloth which loosely clung to his person, tightening his hold more and more and more as his stare turned into a glare directed at the blue skies above him. He hated how much this mere Human affected him, but at the same time, he absolutely adored it. He had spent multiple times in the past just laying on one of the many buildings in his world with his eyes closed, listening to her speak as she conversed with the boy. It was never anything special, never anything beyond a simple and kind friendship, but God, how he wanted to dive in and delve as far into that resonance she emitted in him as far as his faded mind would allow him to._

_The times he thought he would give up, the moments he thought he would let the boy keep his title as King forever were always brought to a close by her. She, in a way, was his **muse**. The inspiration to fight on immediately sparked back more aggressively than ever before when he heard the boy’s dull and simple replies to the girl on the other side. He was used to this by now and knew far too well how distant he could be even in his most intimate of relationships, but **fuck** , did it drive him crazy to hear such dismissal words towards her. The boy didn’t deserve the crown. The boy didn’t deserve to be in control. The boy **never** deserved to be King. Yet, since when was the world ever fair? The world will always seem unfair to one because, either way, someone is going to be on the losing end of the battle. Even if he didn’t gain absolute control, it would all be made tolerable if he could just wrap his fingers around her smaller form, pull her to him and **never** let her go. Shaken, unstable laughter gradually began to leave his lips without his knowledge at the thought, slowly getting louder and more hysterical, an absolute sign of a shattered psyche mixed with pure madness. The scowl on his face was replaced with a disturbingly sly and distinguishable smirk. She was just a Human. Nothing but a simple Human with a little more power to almost see the spirits and hollows around her, but if she was nothing and he was nothing, then wouldn’t they go perfectly together?_

_Together, nobody will ever know._

_Together, nobody will ever see._

_Together, nobody will ever care if those who meant nothing completely disappeared._

~¤ ¤ ¤ ¤~

 

Ichigo has always been such a strange boy. He hasn’t changed since the first day I met him, but I suppose that’s just something that makes him so great to be around. He isn’t the most optimistic person out there, but he sure is a good guy and fun to be around when you show him how to have a good time. I couldn’t help but smile at the thought. As friends, teasing is a very common occurrence between the two of us, but what kind of friends don’t bug each other every now and again? Granted, I know I tend to do it more than he does, but that’s just what friends are for! He always seems so serious and always seems to have something buzzing around that equally as strange head of his, so why not give him a little something to laugh about? He always looks like something is bothering him, but he’s also the type to keep things bottled up and never let anyone know. He’s the type to let things draw out thin until the very end so he doesn’t inconvenience the people around him. He’s always been like that and has always shown off that vibe, but lately, it just seems to be a lot more prominent than it ever was before.

I have asked him time and time again if anything has been bothering him like I know there was only to be dismissed of my concerns with a quick subject change. Getting to crack that big orange head of his sure is a challenge, but I’m still holding out on hope! We have been close friends for a long while now and knowing there’s something that’s causing him problems is being hidden away from me by he himself is really troubling. I can’t do anything to help the enigmatic boy I have known for years directly, so that’s why I always tried to help in other ways. Of course I love spending time with him and I always will, but lately I’ve been doing my best to catch him on his more-than-rare free days to take him out on outings I know he needs to clear his head. It never lasts very long, but at least for those nights, he becomes genuinely happy again. He’s able to let loose and laugh and have some fun like the regular guy he is! He needs to do that more often…I wonder when we’ll be able to have more days like those together. They certainly weren’t as frequent as they were back then, but I suppose that gives them a better air of importance. I mean…I always hold them near and dear no matter what we do, but it doesn’t stop me from hoping that maybe one day, things will go back to normal. Even then, though, I’m not so sure what the cause of this oddity is.

Looking up at him as we neared my home, I offered him a friendly grin when he turned those brown hues of his towards me. Night had quickly fallen over the world around us faster than I had anticipated it to, so we had to call our day to an end in spite of how much fun it was to have a day together away from the craziness of life. He had always insisted on walking me home despite the fact that my house was in the complete opposite direction of his own and, no matter how hard I tried to convince him that I’d be fine on my own, nothing ever changed his mind. He always said it was dangerous to walk on alone at night and I suppose I could understand where he’s coming from. Either way, there was no arguing with the boy when he made up his mind, so I had given up that battle with him a long time ago. “I hope you had fun today.” I spoke up, breaking the peaceful silence set down between us. “It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other like this, so I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.” One of those rarer soft smiles angled his lips gently as he responded with a slight nod of his head. “Yeah, it was nice.” Came his simple reply. “I’ve been needing a day out to relax…”

His open-ended sentence left me biting my lower lip with my gaze drifting down to our feet so he wouldn’t notice the concern I was sure my eyes withheld. Why didn’t he ever just open up about things with me? Why didn’t he just talk to me about what was bothering him? There was a possibility that I wouldn’t be able to help him as much as I’d like to, but I’m always willing to listen to him. I’m always willing to lend him an ear to listen and a shoulder to lean on, but he never accepted them for the bigger things. Sure, he came to me for small issues he needs advice on, but when it comes to big, important things I just know he’s dying to let out, he never bothers to give me that chance to help. I know it’s not exactly any part of my own business, but it’s just that…we’ve been friends for such a long time; I feel like I should be there for him no matter what. Does it make me a bad friend that I haven’t gotten through to him? Is it bad that maybe, just maybe, I’m not trying hard enough to break through that thickly built wall of his that he let up even before we met each other? I felt an ache in my chest at the thought, the sensation wiping the smile off my face pretty quick.

“Ichigo…” I began as we made the turn on the road my house was on. “Are you sure there’s really nothing bothering you…?” I finally found the guts in me to turn my gaze back up to meet his own with my hand subconsciously gripping on tight to the hem of my shirt. “I mean, you haven’t really been yourself lately. It feels like, with every day that passes, you’re just getting farther and farther away from me. You always tell me that you’re doing okay, but I…I don’t know. I don’t think you’re completely okay.” I wasn’t too sure what gave me the strength inside to bring this up to him, but no matter what it may have been, the words were out now and it caused for him to give me his own look of worry before he turned his gaze away from mine. “I’m fine, _______. There’s really nothing for you to be so worried about.” He mumbled out his usual distant reply, his sight now set directly before him, watching anything and everything except for me. I frowned at this, the hold I had on my shirt getting a little tighter. “But…But, Ichigo, you haven’t been the same you as before. You just seem so distracted all the time whenever we hang out. It always looks like you have something on your mind that you just can’t run away from.”

I released a shaky, nervous breath as we walked up to my door once we had made it down its front path, the three steps leading up to my porch almost feeling like a couple of mountains I had to surpass on their own because of the tension I held through this situation. “I worry about you, Ichigo.” I confessed to the orange haired boy, our eyes finally meeting once more as he turned his gaze back to mine without a choice of his own in the matter. Where else was he going to look when he was standing right in front of me? “I just want you to be okay, that’s all.” The look in his eyes seemed to soften at my words, the concern he once held over his expression now melded down to what could have either been pity or guilt. I didn’t know which to believe it may have been. “I am okay, _______. The last thing I’d want is for you to be worrying so much about me. Really, you don’t have to. I’m completely fine and if I wasn’t, I’d tell you. So, it’s alright. Okay?” I instantly knew he was lying to me. He had lied to me about things like this before on multiple occasions, but once again, I just…let it be. I saw no reason in arguing with him when I knew it was just going to end in another ‘I’m okay’ which couldn’t be broken through.

Sighing softly, I tore my gaze away from his own and reached to unlock my door after pulling my keys out of my pocket, nodding my head to him with a quiet ‘okay’. “If you say so,” I murmured as I drew the door open and walked inside before turning to give him one last gilded smile. “Then okay. Goodnight, Ichigo. Have a safe walk home.” With that, I closed the door after a short goodbye between us and a wave of our hands, the last thing I saw from him being the small smile he gave me in an offer of comfort. I knew it was true and genuine, but that’s just what made it hurt worse inside when I knew I couldn’t give him one as real back. Not when I knew there was more behind to his words than he let on. Locking the door from the inside, I leaned into its frame to press my forehead against the cold wooden surface, the deafening silence of my empty home echoing around me. I have no idea how long I had ended up standing there in the same place, but I didn’t care to figure it out. All I could do was let my eyes wander as all kinds of thoughts ran through my head without an end in sight. Yet, despite how many there were and how they may differ, they all came back down to the basic desire of knowledge: what was going on behind closed doors?

When the silence in my home became unbearable to withstand with the mercilessness of my thoughts, I parted from the door and wandered over to my bedroom through the dark, not bothering to turn a light on in my path. Though I did stumble across a few things on the way through the dark, the moon’s light quickly cast itself down and washed over my surroundings in a lovely shade of blue when I opened the door to my bedroom. I had accidentally left the blinds open from my window when I left with Ichigo earlier in the day, but I’m actually grateful for it now. I don’t want to turn on the lights. I don’t want to have to turn anything on and get wrapped up in some silly mindless chore my head could think up of doing to keep me away from reality. All I wanted to do was sleep. I had a wonderful day with a close friend I am starting to see less and less of with the passage of time, but I couldn’t feel genuinely happy for very long anymore with the time we had together. It almost felt like a form of mockery towards me because it was just like getting a small glimpse into something that, soon enough, would be completely out of my reach…gone forever…

I closed my eyes tight at the thought and gave a vigorous shake of my head. No! Stop thinking about it! Stop it, stop it, stop it! Ichigo wouldn’t just leave me behind like that…He may be the type to hide his hardships, but I know damn well that he isn’t the type to just leave his friends behind in the dust without a care in the world. He’s better than that. Wanting to get those nagging ideas out of my head, I denied myself the path to wander in my mind by focusing on the changing of my clothes, pulling my day clothing off of myself before slipping on a comfortable set of loose, breathable pajamas. Knowing full well what would happen if I let my mind have its way, I simply ignored the inklings to try as best as I could while I crawled into bed, bringing the covers up over myself enough to keep warm with my face being the only part of me left exposed to the outside world. I always wrapped myself up in a cocoon like this in the night. It felt warmer…safer...Being wrapped up beneath the covers always made me feel like nothing mattered outside of my small and cozy space. In here, everything was okay. Everything was fine. Nothing bad could ever happen. Closing my eyes at the thought, I simply let myself sink into the dreary tire the day’s events and the recent talk with Ichigo placed me in, allowing for sleep to settle in as it may.   

All I could do as I drifted off was hope I could make him feel the same comfort I felt wrapped up in my own little world within my blankets.

All I could wish for was for it to be that easy.

 

~¤ ¤ ¤ ¤~

 

A sudden cacophonic rumble of lightning piercing through the night is what brought me back form the blank, dreamless space sleep had set me in.

I awoke with a stir, jolting up straight in bed as I took in my surroundings. With a sudden harsh pounding of my heart, I let my widened eyes scan my darkened bedroom before setting their gaze on my window. I had refrained from drawing the blinds before I went to bed earlier, so I could see just how hard the sudden flash of rain was pounding against the glass without mercy in its symphonic drumming. It hadn’t really seemed like rain earlier in the day, but weather can really be unpredictable like this sometimes. Though the simple realization of the stormy weather had since sunken in and my quickened heartbeat had calmed its weary self, I still couldn’t help but feel a little uneasy in my own space. No matter how hard I tried to look through my room, how thoroughly I tried to take in its every little detail with each passing glance I made, something just didn’t feel right…There was something in the air that stirred, that created tension I could almost feel weighing down on my very person. What _was_ that? Why did it feel so… _wrong_?

Unable to take the instability and anxiety sitting down any longer, I tore myself away from the safety of my little blanketed cocoon and stood to my bare feet. Unsure of where I should be directing my gaze specifically, I cautiously walked on with shifting eyes, taking in my surroundings to the best of my capabilities. I wasn’t sure where this feeling had come from or just what caused it, but it was starting to leave goose flesh all over my body, starting out from the outer sides of my arms and quickly racing down my entire form. How could there be nothing in here when I swear I can feel its presence? Whatever _it_ may be, anyways. I shivered at the thought and the horrid weather outside really wasn’t helping my case. With near silent footsteps, I had inspected the entirety of my room in a general aspect to find nothing, so I started to think – maybe the feeling wasn’t in my room, but outside in another or maybe even along the halls? Quickly, the image of a masked intruder flashed through my mind, forcing my poor heart to start on its frantic race once more. No…! If someone had broken into my home, I would have heard them by now! Right…? Taking in a long and shaken breath, I shifted my gaze towards my door and slowly wandered towards it, my hand reaching out in its shaking state to take a frightened grip of the doorknob.

That’s when I heard it.

That deep, almost mechanical-like **_cackling_**.

I could feel as the hairs over the back of my neck rose up all at once, that goose flesh from earlier having come back with a vengeance. My heart all but stopped within my chest as I balled my hand into as tight a fist as I could in some kind of weak way of trying to maintain stability over my abruptly quivering form. With a sharp turn on my heels, I stared ahead of myself with the thought of catching the intruder I envisioned in my mind standing before me, but all I was faced with was the emptiness of my room and the flashing of the lightning outside shining through my window. I brought my hands close my chest, gripping onto the thin material of my shirt as I tried to keep the little composure I had left, trying to convince myself of a logical sounding explanation for what I had heard. _It was just the wind,_ I thought. _It could have just been the sound of the rain on my window. It could have been that mixed with the wind. It could have been the rustling of the trees outside. It couldn’t have been a person…! How could it be when there’s nobody here but me?_  

“ ** _Mmm, would you look at yourself? You’re already trembling on the spot. Isn’t this a sight I’ve been dying to catch?”_**

My theories were all shattered and crushed into dust before I could even comprehend the true nature set behind those cynically toned words, the sudden feeling of an invisible force gripping my wrists and forcing me down onto the ground stopping any attempt I may have made for an escape. The feeling of two rough hands clamping down on my wrists and forcing them both my head against the floor beneath me pushed the paranormal experience to a whole new level of terror, my eyes widening further in fear at the sight before me. All I could see was my ceiling above me, but I swear I could just make out the shape of _something_ hovering above me. The supernatural and ghostly act seemed so surreal to me, as if I had still been dreaming in bed, trapped in a nightmare, but the force of the push with the tightening of those calloused hands on my flesh felt so _real_. It was all just bearing down on me so abruptly at the same time, I could practically feel the adrenaline beginning to rush through my veins as I opened my mouth and let out as loud and shrill a scream as my lungs could possibly muster.

Frantically I began to thrash about, tugging and pulling against the force which held me with all the strength I had within myself, but nothing seemed to work. Whatever it was that was holding onto me was keeping me down in an iron grip, a grip that clearly showed no intention of letting me go anytime soon. For the life of me, I knew I didn’t have the strength to fight against whatever this apparition may be, but I fought back against it as best as I could anyways, the fear of what may happen if I didn’t flooding my system so much faster than I ever expected it to. Yet, even as the panic all but took complete control of my very self, I could see the form above me begin to gain a clearer shape, gaining color and sudden hazy flashes of pale flesh and clothing which quickly came into view only to disappear a second or two afterwards. I couldn’t believe my eyes, couldn’t believe what my mind was trying comprehend that was right before me. All I could really find the will in me to do was scream and fight for a way to escape whatever the terrifying illusion may be.

As I did so, however, I could feel the two hands force my own closer together above my head. The pressure one of its hands forcefully created over my left wrist’s skin was momentarily released only to be reapplied in just one of its hands now. I thought maybe I would have the leverage with the sudden release, but God, was I wrong. No matter how hard I tried to push against it, it held me down like a ball and chain, the pressure applied only getting tighter and tighter to the point of it being painful. Just as a cried whimper of pain left me, I felt the almost gentle push and pressure against my lips of a finger, set in a way that felt as if it were telling me to bring my voice down to a whisper. The looming, hazy figure leaned down over me then, the heat from its body prominently radiating onto my own from how close it was. I could feel its hot breath warm over my ear as a deep, husky chuckle escaped it, its sound still making it seem as if it were submerged underwater. “Awe, come on,” It tittered. “Don’t start with that screaming bullshit now. It would be such a shame to have to cut that little tongue of yours out before we can find a better use for it, right?” Three of its fingers almost curiously set their tips over the space between my lips, forcing them to apart as it pulled down to force my mouth open. All the while, the wet feel of a tongue ran its path over the shell of my ear and forced a violent shiver to grip a taut hold of my spine.

“ _Wouldn’t you agree?_ ”

I could feel myself violently begin to tremble beneath the figure beyond my control no matter how hard I tried to calm myself down. My chest rose up and down as quick as my lungs took in the air they so desperately seemed to cling to. Despite the being’s threat, I whimpered heavily to it in reply and jerked my head to the side, forcing its fingers to leave my lips alone. Through that slight sign of disobedience, however, I damn well did keep my mouth shut tight. I didn’t know what this thing was, but if this was really happening, there was no way I was going to risk having a mouth full of blood and void of a tongue. With that gruesome thought implementing itself into my mind, I turned my terrified gaze up to the hazy figure above me, knowing full well that I probably looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Though the figure had been hazy up until this point, I could see that the color which attached to its flesh and clothes began to stay and become prominent, the sight no longer seeming like I was looking through an opaque piece of glass. Gradually, the being gained its appearance, making itself known to me with a wicked smirk and a menacingly sharp gaze of pitch black and bright yellow blocking the view I once had of the ceiling.

I had nearly forgotten how to breathe when its form finally made sense to me, when it showed just _who_ it was. As tight as I could, I balled my trembling hands into fists within his taut grip, the sensation of my nails digging into my skin not stopping me in the slightest. The fear shocked and instilled deep within myself prevented me from feeling the full extent of damage I was probably really causing myself and, though I was fully aware of it, I couldn’t stop myself. My eyes widened as far as they could, my heart vigorously pumped and pounded against my ribs in protest, my mind came to a sudden halt with its thoughts and images when I realized who this being was…Or more so who it resembled. “I…I-Ichigo…?” I finally found my voice, cracked and weak as it may have been. He looked just like him…! Looked just like the orange headed guy I had just been with a few hours ago, but this one…this one was so different, too…His skin and hair a deathly pale white, his eyes coated over with those terrifyingly piercing new colors and his voice none like his own. He slowly ran a slick blue tongue along his lips as my horrified gaze met his, that large smirk only seeming to get larger.

“Try again, _______.” He hummed to me in reply, setting both of his legs on either side of my trembling body before straddling me down, only making it harder to move and try to fight against him. “I know the King and I share a lot in looks, but we’re not at all the same.” Quickly, my panic began to escalate further when I noted the smooth roll of my name from that inhumanly blue tongue of his and I couldn’t find the will in me to do anything else but vigorously shake my head to him in denial. This can’t be real, this can’t be real, this can’t be real…! This man, this Ichigo impostor, this…this _thing_ just appeared out of nowhere! He was completely invisible to me before, completely see-through! How could that be possible if this were real and how the hell did he just come to life for me all of a sudden…! This had to be a nightmare, there had to be a logical reason for this…! Yet, the frantic search my freaked mind made for one quickly came to a dead-end. There was no logical reason behind all of this other than it being a dream or it being a trick of the dark when I couldn’t see him before. Then…what about the skin and hair? I suppose both of those could be explained along with freaky eye contacts, but what about the blue tongue? What about the heavy and strange feeling I had before all of this? What about the sound of his voice and his uncanny resemblance to Ichigo?

His free hand gripping my jaw in a tight hold abruptly pulled me out of my hectic thoughts and forced a heavy whimper to leave me involuntarily once more, the sound of thunder still booming outside without remorse. Slowly, the man leaned into me again, his hot breath now focused over the skin of my neck after he had forced my head to tilt back against the floor. “I’ve waited a long time for you to finally be able to see me,” He muttered, his lips brushing against my neck with each of his words. “And fuck, has it been a _long_ wait, but…seems like you finally got it, huh?” The mechanical-like rumble of his voice and laughter echoed with the thunder in my room before I felt him press his tongue against my skin once more, slowly sliding it up the length of my neck. I couldn’t stop myself from letting out a disturbed and distressed cry at the unpleasantly intrusive sensation as I tried to pull away from him, but his vice-like grip just wasn’t letting me do anything. “You know,” He murmured by my ear once he got to it. “There’s just something about your fear that I can’t seem to get enough of…I _love_ it.” His hold on both my wrists and jaw tightened so much more at his words, another cry leaving me through the pain it forced upon my fragile bones and flesh. “You really need to stop this stupid struggling, though.” He hissed sharply. “It’s really getting on my nerves. Do you really want me to tear at you so quick? I wouldn’t mind it at all. I’ve been waiting a hell of a lot to get my hands on you, ya know? I’d love it, but I’m not so sure you’ll feel the same.”

Fear was such a mocking understatement about what I felt. I could never put into words how horrid it felt deep inside of myself during this whole situation, but there was still a part of me that was convinced this couldn’t be supernatural. This couldn’t be something unexplainable. He was a nutcase, a psychopath that had somehow known of Ichigo, dressed himself as a messed up version of him and came to seek out some unknown vengeance on me for whatever reason he may have. My mind refused to accept that this was out of Human capabilities, everything he said to me jumbling up in my head without any thoroughly processed meaning behind any of it. All I could do was try to find a way out of this. “P-please,” I managed to crack my voice out once more. “You can take whatever you want f-from here, but _please_ j-just don’t hurt me…! I p-promise I won’t call the police or t-tell anybody about this if you just l-let me go…!” The room fell into an unsettling, petrifying silence for what felt like an eternity after what I had begged to the unknown man had been added to the tense air around us, nothing but the harsh sounds of a raging storm engulfing us in the dark.

Suddenly, however, the painful vice-like grip on my wrists loosened to a somewhat bearable degree and his hold on my jaw completely released. Low, quiet snickering left him then, quickly escalating to loud fits of hysterical laughter as he pulled himself back from my form enough to throw his head back and keep me down in place. I watched in disturbed horror as the glee and pure hilarity made itself more than noticeable on this messed up soul’s person, his chest quickly rising and falling in his moment. Soon enough, he began to regain his composure, bringing his view back down to me with a wide, unsettling grin. Brusquely in a quick, sudden movement, he readjusted his hold on my wrists so he had one in each of his hands again, moving them roughly down on either side of my head. His body moved and shifted, pressing down closer to my own as he brought his face mere inches away from mine. The malicious and devilish look in his inhuman gaze forced my blood to run cold and my breath to hitch, the world around us seeming to freeze in place with his actions.

“You just don’t get it, do you?” He hissed out lowly in a malevolent tone harsh enough to cause those unpleasant shivers to grip onto me again and rattle me to my very core. “There’s no getting out of this for you. You’re not going to get away from me no matter how hard you try or how much you pray. I’m not like you. I’m not like the other silly little Humans you run around with here in this ‘peaceful’ little world of yours. I’m not like the Humans you can get rid of in your world with a peaceful agreement signed on a piece of paper. I’m a demon, a nightmare, a poltergeist that will follow you until the day you die and curse your soul for all of time beyond that. Whatever you want to stick with that makes your silly little heart happy. The point of the matter is, you’re not going anywhere. You’re not leaving me. You’re not escaping this. You may think you can run away from me, you may even think you can have me locked away again. Hell, when you finally figure out what the fuck is going on, you may even think that the King will be keep me away, but there’s no saving you now. There’s no running away. There’s no hiding. I’ll never leave you be from now on until I can finally have you to myself without restrictions and be able to completely corrupt and abolish every single little last drop of innocence you have in that beating heart of yours.”  

No force in the universe could have torn my gaze away from his own during his more than bloodcurdling speech simply because I was still in a state of horrified disbelief. None of this made sense, none of it could be real. Yet, I could _feel_ him, could _hear_ him, could _see_ him and _believe_ he meant every single one of the words that left his pale lips. Tears forced themselves to cloud over my vision, obscuring the view I had of him until the heavy droplets slowly rolled down my temples to make way for more. Through it all, through everything he had said and done, I still couldn’t bring up the courage or will within me to say as much back, I couldn’t find the strength within myself to fight against his hold anymore, but one question had made itself prominently known in the angry ocean waves that had become my jumbled up thoughts. The words each stood out to me in my head, my lungs desperately tried to fill themselves with the air my body needed to speak, my tongue rolling and moving on its own. 

“W-who are you…?”

The malicious grin on the man’s face seemed to shrink in response to my weakly whimpered question, but his expression still retained its look of pure insanity. It seemed something like that would never leave someone like him. “I don’t have a name.” He replied. “Ichigo has managed to keep me down and locked away for a long time now, a very long time, but the pathetic fool thinks I’ve been lying dormant. I may not have much power as of now, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have my own strings and lengths of thread to pull for myself. Soon enough, I’m going to take control from the King and when I take his crown for myself,” He growled deep and rough, an insane look of excitement flashing through his double-colored hues. “I’m going to drag you with me. I’m going to completely break that mindless innocence of yours and bend you right down to my will. What’s a King without a pet? Sure, I’ll have my horse, but I want so much more than that. I am extremely greedy, after all.” Another one of those awfully chilling laughs of his rumbled from deep within his chest, the glee in everything he did and said causing for my stomach to flip a million different times as the tears in my eyes remained merciless and unforgiving.

“Until then, though, I’ll just have settle for this. The King is weak and with each passing day we get sucked into another confrontation, he gets weaker. He thinks he can stop it from happening, but he can’t and you should keep that in mind as well. _You’re **mine**_.” Without another word and without giving me a chance to try to gather up my thoughts and composure, the impostor pushed forward to force his lips to roughly press against my own. There was nothing emotionally wanting about this, no kind of reasonable desire, just something raw and unfeeling. It was like an awful instinct in him had finally breached the surface, making due with all of the promises and cautionary words he had given me. His body pressed down flush against my own, squeezing me between himself and the floor beneath me. His grip remained taut on my wrists as his nails now dug into my skin as my own had done earlier in the night. The rough movement of his lips on my own felt completely wrong and invasive, a dark hint of lust hidden behind his actions making itself known as I felt him pay an especially harsh bite to my lower lip, tugging it between his teeth.

I let out a cry of protest and further pain against him in response as I frantically tried to fight against him again, but in this straddled down position beneath his larger, stronger frame, there wasn’t much I could do no matter how badly I may have wanted to. The scream I let out against his invasive lips didn’t help at all, either, the feeling of that inhuman tongue of his forcing itself into my mouth making my stomach flip more times than I could ever recount. As tight as I could, I closed my teary eyes and allowed for the bitter droplets to fall where they may as my back arched, the feeling of his tongue pushing down on my own before diving down as deep as it could making me kick my legs frantically beneath him with muffled out screams forcing passed his lips. Yet, my motions and shouts of struggle only seemed to amuse the man further, making his actions more intense, even. I could feel his form rock against mine, could feel it slowly grind down to press every single last inch of our bodies together. After what felt like ages, he had pulled his tongue and lips back from my own, though he had left behind the taste of him and my own blood which slowly slid down the cut on my lower lip he had created.

With an unsettled, desperate cry, I tried and tried and tried to push him off, but nothing worked. Nothing ever did. He didn’t care about the shouting or crying anymore, it seemed, since he simply latched onto a vulnerably exposed part of my neck and vigorously began to bite and suck. The sensation forced my body to curve and arched against his own further involuntarily with whimpered yowls of displeasure mixed with something I had never felt before. The harsh attention paid to that sensitive patch of skin forced me to squirm and kick harder, my breathing quickening and my skin boiling over as I tried to get a handle on myself despite not being able to do anything towards the situation at hand. I was desperate to set myself free, deathly afraid that he would do the unthinkable after forcefully marking my skin with his bite, but just as quickly as it all began, he had pulled away from me. Leaving me in a trembling, quivering, horrified state beneath him, I stared up with what I knew was revulsion and a silent plead for mercy, but all I ever received in return was his malicious, uncaring smirk. “That should do it for now.” He snickered, slowly licking his lips clean of the stains of blood he had forced upon my skin.

“Say ‘hi’ to the King for me.”

With that, the man slowly disappeared from above me, the weight and pressure his body and grip held over me fading away all at once. Soon, I was back to staring at the plain beige color of my ceiling with tears staining my skin and blood slowly dripping from my lip and neck. My chest quickly rose and fell as it had done earlier as I let my gaze wildly wander, searching for the pale man who had just been above me, but I completely refused to move any inch of my being. The silence of my room once again fell upon me as I realized that there was no one in here but me again and the only sound came from the raging storm outside. For a moment, a split fraction of a second, I thought it had all just been an illusion after all. I thought maybe I was going insane and the person I had seen was just a strange vision of Ichigo my mind decided to manifest before me because of everything that had been going on, but the blood on my skin, the ache in my body and the taste of his tongue told me otherwise. I didn’t know what to do, didn’t know what to think or how to even begin processing what had just happened to me or everything he had told me about us and Ichigo. All that kept replaying in my head was ‘ _you’re mine_ ’ and the phrase forced my expression to scrunch up in distress and fear once more.

All I knew how to do was curl up and cry over the apparition that abruptly made its presence known in my life as the rain pelted continuously against the glass of my window from the outside.

 

~¤ ¤ ¤ ¤~

 

_The sky had turned dark by the time he was forced to submit beneath the King’s reign once more. Everything gained a darker shade of light, darkening further as the clouds gathered in angry riots up above in the overturned world. The balance of power between the King and his horse had been teetering more and more as time passed, the darker side to the boy’s abilities slowly contaminating his conscious. Though he may be forced to remain seated in submission amongst the endless skyscrapers, he knew the story would soon shift. The King would soon stumble in his carelessness and, when that moment comes, he’ll be there to overthrow him. As soon as that happened, the Human on the other side wouldn’t have a prayer to save her name. When everything that had happened up to this point is displayed for one to see, however, she still didn’t have a prayer even now. The mark was set, the target in his sights and nothing was going to stand in the way of that. He may not know who he is, he may just as well be nothing, but no matter what way things turn out to be, she was destined to be ruined by him. Until that time came to its full prophecy, he would remind her of it just as he had made clear to her that night. May the fact of this never leave her mind, for it would lead her to her end at a much quicker pace._

_There was just something about that Human’s special kind of warmth that riled up every single fiber within his being. That kind of warmth which he lacked was just something he so desperately wanted to completely tear apart and let it freeze over so as to force her to be just like him, but there was that much more discreet part of him that wanted to sink into it as well and discover just what it must be like to live like that. Unlike many other spirits and regular hollows, the man had never lived a regular life. He had never been Human like Ichigo, had never experienced the world on the outside. The only thing he knew was the repetitive fishbowl he resided in. She not only held blissful ignorance and innocence to the terrors of the world around her, but also to the horror of a world he himself was forced to live and know of. He wanted to drag her into these depths, watch as that innocence and purity of warmth slowly escaped her. He wanted to see the look on her face when her once fairytale booked world came crashing down right before her and all she would have left was **him**. As malicious as it sounded and as maniacal as his intentions may have been, there was also a curiosity that sparked within him. How **would** she react? What would she do? Would she scream? Put up a fight? Or just lay down and die?_

_He wasn’t too sure how to feel about that._

_He assumed he would figure that out by the time he got there._

_There was no doubt in the statement. No doubt in the idea that this would come to be one way or another. There were no ifs, ands or buts about this. She would fall and he would lace a pretty little collar around her neck just to prove she was his. Oh, how the thought was thrilling. It thrilled him more than he could ever explain with words. The wide, chilling smirk that angled his lips and morphed his expression was enough to say so much more about it than mere words ever could. He had never felt so gleeful before and that was really saying something when it came to the peculiar hollow. There was many a time in which he was found with a wide grin and a loud cackle, always one to be witty and quick with the sharp tongued remarks. Yet, this was completely different. This was a disturbingly darker kind of glee he had been encompassed by. The happenings of that night kept replaying in his head over and over again. He kept envisioning the looks she gave, the sight of her tears; kept remembering the taste of her skin and blood. Shivers overtook him in the best of ways as that cracked mind worked over everything he could possibly do during their next encounter. How badly should he scare her? How badly should he mark her? How badly did he want to her hear scream?_

_Oh God, he wanted to hear it again._

_There was no denying the hollow’s intentions were anything but good natured. There would be nothing more than mercilessness and nothing less, but his curiosity more than anything else stopped him from going too far. He could have killed her if he wanted to. He could have literally torn her apart and licked the blood right off of his fingers with nary a care if he saw fit, but he didn’t. He didn’t kill her and he didn’t think he ever would. Where was the fun in that? No, if there would be any death between the two of them, it would only be the death of her sweet little innocent mind. Otherwise, he’d let her live. Of course he’d let her live. What was the point in having a pet if you would simply get rid of it a few moments after having found it? A high-pitched, delighted cackle left the boy’s lips in thought of all the possibilities that now lay ahead of him. He didn’t need to worry about anything now. He knew what was going to happen and what would be of him with that Human. Their fate was sealed by his hands. Looking down at them, he felt that shiver ride up his spine as those thoughts continuously swarmed in his mind until it all temporarily came to a halt when he noticed a drop of water land on the center of his right palm. Furrowing his brow in his ever growing interest, he turned those brightened golden hues up towards the sky above him._

_Gradually, more drops began to fall from the darkened and enraged heavens above, the sound of the water beginning to form an orchestra throughout the endless, empty world around him. He grinned at the sight, knowing full well what the sudden change in weather meant in this land. Zangetsu never liked the rain. Zangetsu always hated it whenever the rain began to fall and had always wanted to do everything to keep it from coming, but sometimes, these kinds of things were just out of one’s hands. He, on the contrary, loved the rain. He loved the impact of the water, loved the sounds it made, the feelings it washed over his pale figure. With his now damp snow white locks sticking to his forehead, he kept his view locked up on the sky, watching the storm begin to form and take shape before his very eyes. Seems like the King received word from his pet. Everything is starting to move like perfect little cogs in the exact direction he knew they would._

_Watching it all unfold from beneath the rain, he knew it was only just the beginning._


	2. Wilting Jasmines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After acquiring the ability to see the world of spirits around her, _______ finds herself in a state of disarray and darkness. The life she once knew is no more and she now also has to deal with the monsters she can see walking amongst the living as well. With no one to turn to and no one she thinks would believe her, she makes herself recluse from her friends - especially Ichigo. After she had been attacked by the ghostly impostor in her own home, she doesn't know how to look at her old friend anymore without feeling the world crumbling down around her. Eventually, however, the torment of her new ability becomes too much for her to bare, so she decides to visit an old friend in hopes of getting some sage advice on how to cope with her sight all while trying to heal from the memory of her otherworldly encounter with the Ichigo lookalike. The world _______ once knew is no more and the one she has been tossed into now is far crueler than she can ever begin to imagine. There's no way around it and no way to go back to the way things were in the past. The only path to take now is the one walking forward - straight through the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After nearly two years of leaving my Hollow Ichigo one-shot on its own and hearing from people who wanted a sequel, I've finally decided to write one up for you guys! Hope this meets expectations and that you all like this continuation! So sorry for the long wait!! ;W; Also, once again, my apologies for any factual errors I may have made with the canonverse since I haven't really looked into the Bleach series for a while ;w; I did my research before writing, but sorry for any slip-ups if they're there!

Every morning starts out the same.

Scaring myself awake from repetitive nightmares, sitting in a cold sweat with tears in my eyes. My limbs shake, trembling without remorse, and my gaze desperately searches the room I once felt so comfortable in to see if I was the only one in it. The beating heart in my chest, though running as it should to keep me breathing, begins to vibrate with the anxiety which floods my veins as the memories mercilessly strike at my very core.

There’s never any kind of variation from the norm. My mornings always consist of myself sitting alone in bed with unease and panic guiding me through the episodes. As soon as I realize things are safe, I look down at the marks still littering my body to remind myself the safety could disappear in the blink of an eye without any sort of warning. That always gets me on my toes and anxious to step out of bed, which is something I have been desperately needing nowadays: inspiration to step out of those covers. Like any other normal person, I would prefer that inspiration to be something positive; a lover waiting for me in the early hours of the day; some errands to run to be productive; a date with friends to spend the day out on the town. That’s all I’d like…but that just doesn’t seem possible to get a hold of in the life I’m living anymore.

Instead of waking up to happiness, I wake up to nightmarish images in my head. It never changes. The only variation I get is the type of nightmare my mind decides to play for me for the evening. Will it be a replaying of the night I was attacked by the ghostly man who looked like one of my closest friends – the very same who left all these marks on my skin? Or will it be a scene where I’m running away from one of those…terrifying monstrosities I’ve been seeing left and right lately only to have myself fall and be eaten alive? Oh, what _joy_ the evenings bring me.

The monsters, though…I don’t know what to make of them. The incident with the Ichigo impostor had definitely won its place of gold in the rankings of the worst things that have ever happened to me, but seeing those beasts wander the streets of Karakura Town while nobody else around me could tell they even existed? Now _that_ took a close second. Horrifying would be an understatement to what they are…Bodies of pure onyx and faces built of pale white skulls…The memory of the ones I’ve seen already haunt me even during the day. The worst part of it, however? The worst part was definitely the fact that I wasn’t sure yet if it was all real or not.

I know…I know what happened with that ghostly stranger was real. I have the scars and marks on my skin to prove it. Those monsters, however, are a different story. After all, so far, I swear I’m the only one who’s been able to see them. When I walk around town on my own on the days I dare myself to step outside and run some necessary errands, I see them walking amongst the crowds or through the surrounding trees in the parks of the area – just about anywhere…Enormous, dark, fear-inducing beings who look like they crawled straight out of hell themselves, and I’m the only one witnessing their steps on our ground.

I feel like I’m losing my mind…Nobody is seeing what I’m seeing, I hardly get any sleep anymore with the nightmares raging in my head and the scars on my skin the stranger left on me only make it that much harder to live my life like I used to. There’s nowhere to go, nowhere to hide and no one to turn to. The only family I have lives on the other side of the damn country and it’s not like we’re in good talking terms, either. In fact, I haven’t spoken to them in _years_ and they’re probably the last people I’d ever confide this in. I do have friends who worry about me ever since I’ve secluded myself to my home, friends who send me messages and try to call me to get a hold of me, but there isn’t a single one of them I could consciously approach with my dilemma.

Especially not Ichigo.

Ichigo…He’s the one who’s been trying the hardest to get a hold of me. My phone is filled with missed calls and unread messages from him, but I refuse to answer any of them. I hate worrying him, but there’s no way I can turn to him with this. He would think I’m absolutely insane…Seeing monsters? Attacked by disappearing apparitions in the dark during a storm? He’d probably dismiss it as bad dreams or a lack of sleep. I don’t know what scares me more, either...Having Ichigo deem me a nutcase and leave me back in the dust despite our years of friendship or the fact that, if he were to be right with the notion of me simply seeing things my head creates, it would solidify the possibility that I’m really just losing my mind and there may be something wrong with me.

No. I can’t face Ichigo with this. There’s no way I could tell him my secret and honestly believe he would stick by my side despite how outlandish it sounds. There’s no one I can turn to…At least, that’s what I thought at the start of the nightmare. For the weeks I had been haunted with this radical change in my life, I thought I would have to suffer through my decaying mental state on my own, but today, someone actually came to mind while I had been rummaging through some old photos.

Urahara Kisuke.

I met the odd blonde shopkeeper about a year ago. I had been walking home from some errands and noticed Ichigo walking off somewhere across the road, so I went after him to say hello. We ended up walking to the strange man’s shop together to pick some things up that he needed. I recall him buying a couple of cans of repellent, apparently, though he had never told me what kind. I had assumed at the time they were insect specific. I didn’t really make much of it, but the shopkeeper had become almost like an older brother figure in my life after a day of tea in his home within the shop proceeding Ichigo’s purchase. He had invited us in and, from the start, was always very hospitable. His employees, Tessai, Jinta and Ururu, had also been incredibly friendly (though Jinta had always been a little wilder with a level of bravado to match). They all proved to be, overtime, like a family to me all on their own.

I just hope they’ll continue to be this for me even after I tell them about what’s been going on.

Standing in front of their shop today, the old hood I had been wearing to cover my markings since the start of it all resting atop of my figure to cover my tainted skin, I felt absolutely terrified of knocking on the door. It had been hard enough for me to wander out of my home with all those beasts I have been seeing (thank the heavens I hadn’t seen any on the way over) along with the paranoid possibility in my head of running into the Ichigo impostor again, but having the possibility of losing Urahara and the others looming over my head made me shake right down to the bone. My heart ached, my joints groaned with protest with every move I made, my eyes stung and my eyelids battled me with their weighted nights of sleeplessness, but I stared at the door ahead of me regardless of it all as if it were Satan himself.

Who else would I turn to? I know if I don’t talk to _someone_ about this soon, I’ll really drive myself crazy and probably end up actually getting sick by keeping myself locked away at home all the time. Urahara and the others…They’re used to crazy. They’ve never said it out loud, but they react to the oddest things in the world with utmost calm, sometimes even hilarity and enjoyment. Maybe, to them, my predicament wouldn’t seem so farfetched? If it did, maybe they knew of a way to help me get better and make the images of those monsters disappear from my vision…but what of the Ichigo impostor and the marks he left on me?

**_You’re mine._ **

The memory of the impostor’s voice forced a shiver to run down my spine and for my body to stiffen up, my muscle freezing beyond my control. I whimpered as my eyes shut tight on instinct, and as I always do when this happens, I began to whisper to myself: “ _I’m alone, I’m alone, I’m alone. He’s not here anymore. He can’t hurt you._ ” It took me a few minutes of reassuring myself of my safety before I could truly open my eyes again to face the real world around me. Still, the same sliding door stood before me, mocking me with its existence and beckoning me forth at the same time. At last, the triggered memory of the impostor’s voice fueled my decision to speak with the Urahara Shop residents. Reaching forward with a trembling hand, I attempted to knock on the wooden door, but before my knuckles could rap against its surface, it slid open with the aid of another.

Turning my gaze up, I was met with the sight of a smiling Urahara, his striped hat set askew atop of his head of moppy blonde hair. “_______,” He greeted in that cheery, lax tone of his. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Sorry to say the others aren’t here today – they left on some errands bright and early this morning.” He shrugged his shoulders, widening his smile a little more. “So I’m here on my own looking after the shop. Is there anything you needed?” I stood there a moment, staring at the blonde with my hand still raised before myself in a knocking position. I blinked, once, twice, before bringing it back down to my side, my head lowering in the process. It’s probably for the best that only Urahara is here today. I don’t want to freak Jinta and Ururu out with what I have to unload. 

“I…just wanted to stop by for a while…” Hearing myself speak up after what felt like an eternity of silence was…odd. My voice didn’t sound like my own to me anymore, its croakiness masking the happiness I know I once held in my heart. I struggled to get the words out of me, throat clogged and mouth dry. I really didn’t want to speak, but I knew I had to.

“Is that so?” He hummed out with a soft chuckle. “Lucky me~ I’ll have some _______-time all to myself for the day~ Wait till the others hear about this~” He stepped aside, motioning for me to step forward. “Come in, come in. You know you’re always welcome here.” Nodding in reply, I forced myself to stagger forward, my gaze never rising from the ground once it had been lowered. “I’ll go get some tea brewing for us.” I heard the shopkeeper say as I turned my back to him and took my shoes off, placing them by the door. The soft sound of his footsteps patting against woodened floor reached my ears, and by the time I looked up, the man had already disappeared into his kitchen. Shuffling forward, I decided to follow him into the brightly lit room, the contrast to the dark I had forced myself to sit through in my home forcing me to squint against its brilliance for a moment. To remedy the issue, I pulled the hood of my sweater over my head a little farther and guided myself over to Kisuke’s side.

I watched him prepare the tea in silence, though his joyful humming of a tune that seemed to constantly be stuck in his head filled our space with sound. It was a helpful distraction from the thoughts in my head, seeing as I always tried to make out what song he hummed since he made it a game to never tell me till I figured it out on my own. “I hear you’ve been a hard girl to find lately,” The shopkeeper spoke up, never once turning to look at me. “I would have gone searching for you myself if I didn’t know you’d come to me on your own once you were good and ready. Mind telling me why you’ve been playing recluse?” I stared at the back of his head in silence for a moment before shifting my gaze off to the island in his kitchen, hoping to distract myself from my pounding heart.

“No reason…” I muttered out my lie, tracing the rim of a glass mug I recognized as Tessai’s set on the island’s counter.

“Heh, you never were a very good liar, were you, _______? Your tone and attitude give it all away. You’ve always been a very happy and carefree girl, but the woman who’s standing in my kitchen right now,” I could see him turn his head to look me up and down for a moment from my peripheral vision before he wandered away from his kettle on the stove to retrieve a jar of fresh Jasmine flowers from his cabinets. “That’s not you. I don’t know who’s come to visit me today – do you?”

“Not really, no.” I found myself replying without missing a beat. At least that was one thing I knew for certain: I’m not the same person I was a few weeks ago. Humming returned to the silent air of our conversation as the blonde walked through his kitchen to gather everything he needed to properly serve the tea he was making. Cups, small plates for the cups and a couple of napkins were soon set on the counter, just in time for the kettle to whistle.

“You like Jasmine with milk and honey, don’t you, _______?”

“Milk and honey sounds pretty good right about now, yes…”

Isn’t that what the Promise Land is supposed to be made of in the stories of its legends? Milk and honey? I assume it’s a place of peace and happiness…Maybe some of that essence of promise could calm the storms within my breaking conscious. Returning to the kettle he had set aside from the heat, I watched as Urahara brought it over to the cups filled with the white Jasmines he set on the table and carefully poured the boiling black tea mixture into them.

“You know,” He spoke up again, wandering to his fridge while I took the liberty of sitting myself down on one of the stools by the counter when I felt my knees begin to buckle with apprehension. “I often notice that talking about things that bother me over a cup of tea always makes things a little easier to deal with.” He soon joined me then with a jar of honey, a spoon to scoop it with and a small pitcher of milk he had prepared for the two of us. Standing on the side of the kitchen’s island across from me, he met my gaze as he fixed his hat’s position atop of his head. “Is there something you want to let off of your chest, _______?” I stared into his eyes distantly, tiredly, before turning my gaze down to the cup of Jasmine tea steeping in front of me.

“There is,” I murmured, gently cupping the glass of porcelain within my palms, allowing for its warmth to spread upon my skin. The sensation always seemed to calm me, having a cup of hot tea in my hands…Maybe there is some truth behind old Urahara’s words. “But I’m still not so sure if I should let it out…You might think I’m crazy.”

“Crazy?” He laughed out the word. “Now, why would I think that? Have you _met_ me yet, _______? Do you _know_ who I live and work with? Crazy is practically a part of the business at this point!” A reassuring smile angled his lips as he tilted his head a bit to the side. “You know you can talk to me about anything. Would you rather wait the five minutes or so for the tea to steep before spilling it out?”

I let out a shaky sigh in response to his offer. Would that be best? Wouldn’t that just be prolonging the inevitable? “S-sure…”

Silence filled our conversation once more, but the silences which came to Urahara and I were never uncomfortable ones. Despite the fear ruling in my heart of losing him and the others, there was just an odd calming feeling the shopkeeper always brought to me. Perhaps the scent of the Jasmine flowers steeping in the black tea he brewed up were helping with my jumbled nerves as well. I don’t know. Maybe the blonde had planned everything out this way. Whenever I have come to him for advice in the past with a jumbled state following behind me, he always seems to have some trick or another up his sleeve to help me relax so I can take the situation for what it was rather than the exaggeration my mind tried to have me believe in. He also mentioned already knowing about me distancing myself from everyone, so maybe he’s been talking to Ichigo…How else would he know?

Ugh, Ichigo…Thinking about him makes my stomach twist, and I can’t help but feel guilty about that. He’s one of my closest friends, after all. I should be able to tell him anything, just like Urahara says I can do with him, but I just…can’t. I can’t face him after what happened and what I’ve been seeing in my everyday life ever since. All I can think about happening is him labeling me a nutcase and abandoning me, and then…then there were the memories that came back whenever I thought about him. It sucks. It sucks _so bad_. I should be able to think about my friend without drowning in fear and the need to hide thanks to this damn restless anxiety, but that paranormal stranger had completely ripped that ability away from me. I can’t just avoid him forever, though. Eventually, I’m going to have to talk to him again – I just don’t know when that will be.

The few minutes I had to myself while the tea steeped in our cups had been spent in worrying over Ichigo with a flipping stomach. The way I had been snapped out of my daze was when I noticed Urahara’s hand reach for my cup, his fingers gently grazing over my own.

“I think it’s about ready,” He informed me as I handed him the cup. “Let me go ahead and strain it for us.” With that, he stood to his feet and returned to the sink where he strained our tea into new, clean cups which looked identical to the ones they had been steeping in. Soon enough, he returned to join me by the counter and handed me my tea with an expectant smile stretched on his lips. There was no escaping it at this point. He wanted the truth out of me and he wouldn’t let me leave the shop until he hears it. There’s no turning back.

Heaving a deep, shaky breath once more, I cupped my tea within my palms again and turned my gaze down to the colored liquid, a gentle splash of milk soon finding its way into my drink thanks to Urahara’s hand. “Do you…promise you won’t push me away when I tell you?” I whispered my question to him, lowering my head a little more as I watched him dump a spoonful of honey into my tea, giving it a little stir.

“Of course I do.” He replied. “I don’t see why I’d push you away when you so obviously have something weighing down on your shoulders. Go on, _______. Tell me what’s going on.”

I was starting to shake. The tea in my cup began to quiver within its confines thanks to my trembling hands, the motions conveniently mixing the milk and honey within. To try to calm myself before I would begin my tale, I took an unsteady sip of the hot drink and focused on the feeling of it pouring down my throat – hot and soothing. “I-I’ve been…seeing things, Urahara…S-scary things…”

A short silence followed as he took a sip of his own freshly mixed tea. “What kind of things?”

“Things that just…sh-shouldn’t be there…”

“Why shouldn’t they be there?”

“…B-because they’re…inhuman…”

“Inhuman…?” His tone trailed to new territory, the cheeriness it once held getting a little more serious. Had my tale already given him a bad feeling? “How so?”

I stayed quiet. How should I respond? What do I say? That I see monsters straight out of hell walking the streets of Karakura? How do I even begin to describe it? “They look like…d-demons. I can’t really think of a b-better word for them.” I muttered after taking another swig from my tea. “Monsters, I suppose, b-but I feel it’s a bit of an understatement for the… _things_ I’ve been seeing.” I neglected to tell him about the incident with the stranger who attacked me in my home. He said I could tell him anything, but bringing that up just didn’t feel right. Not when that man had looked so similar to Ichigo. I was afraid maybe Urahara wouldn’t believe me or he might even make Ichigo himself out to be the bad guy, but I know that can’t be true…

Can it?

“Monsters and demons huh?” He repeated my terms, the sound of him swishing the tea in his cup around a bit reaching my ears. “What would you say these monsters look like, _______?”

“They’re all different, b-but they’re all dark and have these…s-skull-like faces on them…” Silence. All this silence. Our silences are always comfortable, but right now? Right now, it was agonizing. I couldn’t bring myself to look at the blonde, afraid of the face he would be making or the look he would be giving me. All I did was stare at my tea as my expression scrunched up with my tale. “I’m just so tired, Ura…I’ve been seeing so many things, so many different monsters…I-I can’t bring myself to wander the town like a normal person anymore, I can h-hardly sleep and my head is a mess…This all just came out of nowhere.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say out of nowhere. This has been a long time coming.”

Wait, what? I furrowed my brow at his remark, the tire on my face morphing to confusion. “Why would it be a long time coming?” I finally raised my head, my curiosity and hope for possible answers beating my anxiety this time around. To my surprise, however, I was faced with a grinning Urahara – a sight which only deepened my confusion. “W-what…what are you trying to say?”

“I expected this to happen sooner or later since the very first day we met. Heh, I guess being around Ichigo so much might have rubbed off on you a bit.” He set his cup down on its small plate, flashing me a brighter grin soon afterwards. “I always knew it was only a matter of time before you would finally be able to open your eyes to the world around you. Granted, your spirit energy is still weak, but it’s also stronger than the average Human’s. I suppose you must have gotten a bit of a boost overtime.”

Woah, woah, woah! What? Open my eyes to the world around me? Ichigo having rubbed off on me? Spirit energy?! Just what the hell was Urahara talking about?! I gave him a look of bewilderment, confusion and skepticism, not really knowing how to respond to him. How _am_ I supposed to respond? I have no idea what he’s talking about! It all sounded like something you’d hear from a psychic medium or someone who could see ghosts or something – and what the hell does that have to do with Ichigo? A million questions bogged up my already flooded mind, but before any of them could find their way to my lips, the sound of the shop’s door sliding open interrupted me along with casual footsteps headed on over in our direction.

“Yo, Kisuke, you got a sec? I got something to-”

Speak of the Devil and he shall appear.

Lifting my gaze along with Urahara to see who had come to join in our conversation, I found my eyes meeting with Ichigo’s, the boy standing at the doorway. He had one foot in the kitchen, his right hand resting on the doorframe, but he had frozen in place when we saw each other. As for me, the only thing I could do was stare, feeling as my eyes widened up as much as they could beyond my control. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up on end, goose flesh beginning to reign control over the land that was my skin. I could feel the color all but drain on my expression, but at the same time, my muscles tensed, ready to spring into action so I could get the hell out of this place as fast as I could, if the need should arise.

For a good couple of seconds, silence dominated our space. My hands kept a taut grip on my cup of tea, not for the sake of keeping it to myself, but for the sake of holding on to something. Any tighter, however, and I swear I could have shattered the porcelain right on the palms of my hands. Seeing my orange-headed friend again…it shouldn’t feel _this_ scary – but it did. Everything in me _screamed_ for me to get the hell out of there and save myself from another attack, but I didn’t move. Nothing did. All we did was stare at each other voicelessly. Motionlessly.

“_______?” Ichigo was the first to break the silence. “What…What are you doing here? Jesus, _______, I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for weeks! I thought something happened to you! You could have at least answered my messages!”

I flinched at the sound of his voice and quickly lowered my head, my breathing getting a little faster in fright despite how badly I tried to calm it down. He wasn’t wrong. I _could_ have just answered his messages; I _should_ have just answered his messages – but I didn’t. I didn’t know what to tell him. I was too scared of something happening at the time and, to tell the truth, I still kind of am.

A sigh escaped the boy’s lips at my silence and soon afterwards, the sound of his footsteps entering the kitchen to join us by the counter followed. “Jeez…At least you’re still alive, that’s something.” He commented as he came to take the seat beside me. At that, I subconsciously moved a little farther away from him on my seat. “Seriously, I was close to just forcing my way into your house to see if you were okay, but I figured maybe something was going on with you that made you go silent for so long.” I peeked up at him subtly at his words, but still didn’t say anything. Instead, I simply watched him furrow his brow at me in his perplexity. “What _are_ you doing here?”

“I can answer that question.” Urahara piped up at last in that same cheery voice of his.

“Our little _______ here has finally gotten the gift of sight!”

 

~¤ ¤ ¤ ¤~

 

Spirits.

Shinigami.

Spirit energy.

…Hollows…

A plethora of new information on a world I never even knew existed flooded into my mind all thanks to the truth Urahara and Ichigo had bestowed upon me. Apparently, all of this crazy stuff with me seeing those monsters (which I now know are Hollows) really isn’t just all in my head. Those monsters aren’t just a figment of my imagination – they’re _actually_ there _._ I still don’t know how to feel about that just yet. That means nothing is necessarily wrong with me mentally, but it also means monsters are real…They aren’t just a part of childhood fears living under beds and hiding in closets anymore. Not just that, either. No, on top of that, there’s this entire society on the other side, too, where spirits are supposed to crossover. Then, the people who take care of that place and manage everything with the Hollows and spirits to keep unaware Humans safe in the world we’re in now are the Shinigami.

A group of people both Urahara _and_ Ichigo belonged to.

Shinigami…All this time…They were a part of this world I was completely blind to until just recently. They could see and do these things I could never imagine possible outside of storybooks until today. They always knew this day would come, too…Urahara already told me as much, but when Ichigo admitted the sensation he received of my spirit energy as it grew over time…I didn’t know what to make of him anymore. It’s as if I was looking at a completely different person and no longer the friend I had been so close to for so many years.

It’s not the fact that he had kept being a Shinigami and all of this other insane otherworldly stuff from me. I could understand why he never mentioned anything, and the same goes for Urahara. What’s making me doubt the boy with the orange locks is the information on _Hollows and Shinigami in general_ I received. In the course of an afternoon, my view on the world had completely changed – and in that world, Ichigo was nestled right in the center. This morning, he was just a worried friend of mine who I had neglected to contact in fear of him thinking I was crazy, but now? Now I don’t _know_ who he is. Being a Shinigami with all these kind of paranormal-like abilities…doesn’t that mean he could have very well been the one in my house the other night when I was attacked?

Until now, I had completely denied the possibility. The impostor resembled the boy seated next to me, but he sounded nothing like him, acted nothing like him. He was a phantom all of his own, and yet…now, so is Ichigo. He can do things I never thought possible, and living in a world with things like Hollows…things his kind are supposed to oversee and manage…it isn’t so farfetched to me anymore that it, in fact, _could_ have been him who attacked me in the dead of night those several weeks ago. I don’t know what to think anymore, honestly. I don’t know if I can trust him. Not after all of this.

Ever since the two men had finished their explanation of this new life I’d be leading and had answered the last of my questions, I found myself staring down blankly at my now cold cup of Jasmine tea. What am I supposed to do with myself…? Will life ever go back to the way it once was? No. Probably not; but will I ever find a way to live in peace again? They told me that, with time, I’ll grow accustomed to my abilities, but how can they be so sure? I still hadn’t told them anything about what happened with the impostor, but now that everything is out in the open, maybe I should at least tell Kisuke. Maybe, if it really _was_ Ichigo who invaded my home that night, he could help me somehow…I don’t know. As scary as all of it is and as little trust as I have left in the boy I have known for so many years, it still feels terrible inside to pin it all on him.

He isn’t like that…

He wouldn’t do that…

He isn’t a criminal…

He isn’t a _monster_ …

He isn’t a **_Hollow_** …

Why is it, then, that despite how firmly I tell myself all of this, I can’t get the idea of him being the invader in my home out of my head? Why can’t I shake that image of him being the one who hurt me off of my shoulders? The man looked _just like him_ …How could he explain that away? Not to mention the fact that all Hollows I’ve seen so far have those white skulls for faces…The Ichigo impostor had been completely _bone white_ just like those masks. Is it really so hard to believe that maybe, as a Shinigami, he could change himself enough at will to make him look like that just to pull something off?

**_You’re not escaping me._ **

The memory of his voice made me want to throw up, but I didn’t move from my seat by the counter. Just thinking about Ichigo brought back so many painfully scary memories from that night…Sitting next to him all on its own is hard enough, but trying to process all of this information with the voice repeating in my ear despite the obvious silence in that kitchen was starting to make me fall apart on the inside. I just…want it all to stop. I want it all to go quiet, for it to shut up and lock itself away in a tight chest with no way out. I want to erase the memories in my head and dispose of any kind of fucked up paranormal ability I may have inside of me to give me back my old life.

My head isn’t the safest of places right now. There’s far too much going on in it for me to really handle, and though I sat in the shop’s kitchen with the two males in utmost dazed silence, deep inside, I felt like I was waging a cacophonic war against myself. What do I believe? Who should I trust? Why can’t I just fall asleep now and wake up in my room where nothing had changed at all and nothing had ever happened to me? Why can’t that be possible? Why can’t I just be _me_ again?

“_______? Are you okay…?” Ichigo’s voice pierced through the thoughts like a wave, his words sounding like they came from underwater to me. It was like he wasn’t even there, but upon feeling him place his hand on my shoulder, it became all too real.

“ _DON’T TOUCH ME!_ ”

The terrified cry left my lips before I could even realize what was happening. I could practically feel my soul jump right out of my body when I felt his hand touch me. By instinct, I pushed myself off of the stool I had been sitting on and stood to my feet, the wooden seat crashing to the ground behind me with a loud clatter. In the process, I had unintentionally thrown my cup of cold tea onto the ground along with the chair, shattering the porcelain and spilling its contents all along the tiled kitchen floor beneath our feet. Ignoring it entirely, I took multiple steps back and finally met the orange-headed boy’s shocked gaze again, tears welling up in my eyes thanks to the panic which quickly began to cause my body to tremble.

I don’t know what it was about his touch, but for that split second, it had dragged me right back down to the floor of my bedroom during that storm. I could feel those cold, boney fingers wrapped around my skin, could feel that unnaturally blue tongue sliding along my neck and could hear his wicked mechanical-like cackles right by my ear. As I shivered and shook on the spot, distanced from the two men in the kitchen I was consciously aware I was in, I could feel tears dripping down my cheeks on paths they traced millions of times since this all began. “P-p-please…” I whimpered. “Don’t…d-d-don’t touch me…”

Silence…Silence returned.

The three of us stayed in our spots for what felt like an eternity without moving, when in reality, it was merely a few seconds. I could do nothing but shake and try my best to catch my shaken breath while the men looked at me before they turned to look at each other. Eventually, Kisuke had stood to his feet, adjusted his hat, and offered us an unreadable small smile.

“It looks like to me that you two have a lot to talk about,” He began to make his way to the doorway without looking back, but he did wave to us on his way out. “I’ll just give you some privacy…Take all the time you need.” With that, he was gone. He didn’t wait for anybody to deny or accept his request before he simply vanished into the bowels of the shop’s halls. Neither Ichigo nor myself, however, moved to stop him.

When the only ones left in the kitchen were the two of us and the sound of Kisuke’s footsteps on the wooden floors of the hallways grew silent, I finally forced my gaze away from my old friend. I lowered my head and held my hands in tight fists by my sides gripped on to the baggy material of the hood I was wearing. I tried to make the crying stop, but nothing I told myself in my head could make the flow cease. “ _He won’t hurt you. Ichigo is your friend, he wouldn’t do that to you, and even if he did, Kisuke is here, too. He’ll help you if anything should happen. You’re safe, you’re safe, you’re safe…_ ”

“_______...” My name left Ichigo’s lips just as it always has since the beginning of our friendship…so why did it sound so different to me now?

“D-don’t come any closer…!” I whimpered at him when I heard him stand from his stool and begin to approach. Thankfully, he complied to my demand and stood where he was, silencing his footsteps.

“Okay, okay…but…_______...you don’t have to be afraid. I know this is a lot to take in all at once, but there’s really nothing to be so scared of. I’m not going to hurt you. We’ve been friends for _years_ , _______, you should know that by now.” The sound of his voice lowered, getting quiet and somber near the end of his sentence. “I’m still the same guy you’ve known all this time…you know that, don’t you?”

Instantly, I shook my head. I didn’t even think about it before doing it. It was the most innate response I have had to him all night apart from my departure from the kitchen’s island. “No,” I honestly replied. “I-I don’t think I do…I don’t think I-I know you anymore…”

“Why?” The hurt started to come in. God, I wanted to avoid this part so badly…I didn’t want to hurt him. No matter what, I never wanted to hurt him even if he _had_ been the one to hurt me. “Why does this have to change anything? I’ve always been a Shinigami throughout the entirety of our friendship. Every single second we spent together, we spent it with me being like this. Why does the truth have to change the way you look at me now?”

“It’s not because you’re a Shinigami, Ichigo,” I gave a wet, humorless laugh, bringing one of my hands up to my face to wipe the tears from my eyes and clear my blurry vision. Not like it did much good – they just came right back shortly after I got rid of them. “I can see freaking _ghosts_ , Ichigo-! I-I’m like that kid from _The Sixth Sense_ now! D-do you really think just you being the same w-would make me feel this way about you?” Granted, he wasn’t the same. He was much, much stronger than I, but in my eyes, it was all the same.

We were both cursed with a sight and abilities mortals should never have.

“Then…what is it, _______?” Came his quiet question. “Because, from where I’m standing, it looks like you can’t even look me in the eye anymore after what we just spoke about.”

I always knew this time would eventually come…the time where I’d have to tell him what happened. I tried to tell myself I would never bring it up with him and keep it to myself till the day I die, but all this time, I know I was just prolonging the inevitable. I _need_ answers just as much as he does, and I can’t go about receiving them without bringing the problem to light. I knew all this time that I’d have to tell him…I just wasn’t expecting it to be this soon. The tears in my eyes grew heavier as the realization dawned on me, my shaking getting more unstable with each second that passed us by. I didn’t want to be there. I wish I had never left the house this morning. I wish I had never gotten the idea to talk to Kisuke about the nightmare I’ve been living through…but I did, and now, here I am. No way to escape.

“A few weeks ago…I saw **_you_** in my home, Ichigo…”

He remained silent, beckoning me to continue. “Except, at the same time, i-it wasn’t _really_ you, either. You looked like you, b-but…not like you at the same time…”

“_______, I have no idea what you’re talking about,” He responded. “I haven’t been inside your house in nearly _two months_ …”

“ _Don’t lie to me, Ichigo!_ ” Finally, I forced myself to look up again, firmly meeting his gaze in my desperation and unrest. “I **_saw_** you! You got into my house in the middle of the storm dressed up like some fucked up ghost! I don’t know how you did it a-and I don’t want to know, but you were **_there_**!” To prove a point, I roughly tore at the zipper of my jacket, tugging it downward as hard as I could until it snapped wide open. “ ** _You were there!_** ” I cried to him again and threw the hood off of my body and onto the floor to reveal the tank top I wore underneath, putting my marked skin on display for him – bare and vulnerably real. “You came into my house in the dead of night and you attacked me! You scared the crap out of me and did **_this_** to me! How can you tell me it _wasn’t_ you?! Tell me and make me believe it! **_Please!_** Tell me anything, any kind of c-crazy story you can think of now that you’re a Shinigami! _Just make me believe it **wasn’t** you!_ ” 

The sobbing began to grow unbearable. I couldn’t bring myself to calm down even to scream at him in all the pent up rage I had hidden deep within myself because of everything this situation has caused. As I sniveled and sobbed my shouted words at him, Ichigo, on the other hand, stood there with what could only be interpreted as horror in his eyes. Does that mean I caught him in his lie? My heart all but completely shattered within my chest just like my cup of Jasmine had on the ground. It’s true…My assumption had to be true…It was him, wasn’t it? He wasn’t denying it anymore. In fact, he wasn’t saying a _nything_ for a good while as I tried to recompose myself. It wasn’t until a few short moments later that his expression had darkened with his own internal realization and he had excused himself from the conversation entirely.

“W-what…?! _Ichigo!_ You can’t just leave l-like that without giving me an answer!” I shouted after the boy, my body rushing after him in desperate need for some sort of closure. “ _Tell me the truth! Was it you or not?!_ ”

Once we both made it to the doorway with him out in the hall and myself still in the kitchen, he turned to face me, looming over my shorter from with a stern look on his face. “ ** _Stay here, _______._** ” He spoke with a firmness I had never heard before. The tone itself was enough to make me take a step back from him in sudden fear. “This is more serious than you can begin to understand, alright? I wish I could give you the answer that you want, but I **_can’t_**.”

It’s true, then…

“You’ll just have to trust me,”

It really _was_ Ichigo who attacked me that night…

“And believe that what I’m doing now is for your own safety.”

How am I supposed to believe that? How am I ever supposed to believe anything the stranger walking down the hall away from me has to say again?

 

~¤ ¤ ¤ ¤~

 

It was raining again.

The droplets of cold water poured from the weeping heavens without remorse, battering against one of the back windows of the Urahara Shop. The room beyond it was dark already, a sight that would make anyone believe whoever was inside was sleeping soundly in the night that loomed over them all. However, that wasn’t the case in this particular room. _______, nestled safely inside the small guestroom Urahara had to offer her, remained wide awake with her eyes glued on that very window. Dully, she stared at its glass as the rain pelted against it. To many, storms at night are a welcomed force of nature, for its soothing lullaby could drift just about anybody into a peaceful slumber – anyone but her.

She used to love stormy weather, believe it or not. A rainy night, to _______, was like a gift to her. It always helped her have the most comfortable night’s sleeps she would ever hope to have. Nowadays, however, things have changed. Storms are nothing but uninvited reminders of the past. The rain brings memories to her mind she would much rather leave forgotten and the thunder brings voices to her ears she wished would just vanish from the depths of her scarred mind. Her only saving grace in tonight’s storm is the fact that she isn’t sleeping in her own room.

She didn’t know the full extent of Urahara and Ichigo’s conversation after the orange-headed boy had walked away from her earlier that day, but the result was the shopkeeper insisting she stay over for the night so he and his employees could protect her if anything should happen while Ichigo was away. Apparently, from the little Kisuke had been willing to tell her, her friend was having an inner war all of his own – an inner war with the Hollow inside of him. He didn’t go into too much detail about it, but what she took from it is that he is having some kind of war with a _bad_ side of him and that side was the one who attacked her, the impostor who looked so similar to him yet so different at the same time. He had fought down that bad side of him in the past, but somehow, someway, it’s starting to rear its ugly head in the face of adversity against the young man. They told her Ichigo had gone away to visit a group of people who could help him keep that side of himself locked away – and she believed them.

Everything that had happened was scary to the young girl. She only really knew bits and pieces about what has been going on behind the scenes of her newly awoken abilities and the past her dear friend had led when she was so blissfully unaware of who and what he was. She still wishes everything could go back to the way it was, deep in her heart and soul, but at the very least, she felt grateful she could rest in the capable hands of Urahara and the others while Ichigo got everything sorted out. The reassurance was nice, greatly welcomed, but it still didn’t stop the memories and questions.

Her mind was an entity all of its own. It disobeyed her every wish and command to banish the hurtful memories from mind and, instead, simply played them all on loop for her mind’s eyes to bask in as the rain grew stronger beyond her bedroom window. A shiver raced down her spine as the involuntary flash images of the Hollow’s smirk and tongue raced through her mind, her body quivered beneath the blankets of her futon when she began to feel those ghost fingers trailing along her skin the way they had so many nights ago.

Unable to find a cure to this otherworldly ailment, she turned her back to the window and stared into the darkness of the room she would call home for the next few days. There wasn’t a whole lot in the room. There was a short table, a wardrobe with a few spare changes of clothes Urahara and the others so generously provided her along with a set of drawers for anything she may want to put away in a safe place. Inside those drawers were already a few cans of Hollow Repellent. When Ururu had kindly stopped by her room to hand them to her that night before bed, it finally clicked in her head what type of repellent it was Ichigo had bought from the blonde shopkeeper the first day they came to the shop together.

A frown angled her lips deeply at the thought.

Oh, how she missed those old times…Everything was so simple back then…but then again, maybe it really wasn’t. Maybe she was just blind to the complexity which surrounded them at the time and it is only now that she’s starting to really understand how scary and difficult of a place the world could truly be. Whatever it was, the memory of those peaceful times of blissful ignorance caused for her heart to ache deep down. She really didn’t know how she felt about Ichigo anymore. In the end, it _was_ him who had brought her all of her scars – both mental and physical – and yet…she knew now that it wasn’t because he wanted to do it. She knew it wasn’t the _real_ Ichigo who had done these terrible things to her. So, if that’s the case, what does this mean for the two? She just doesn’t know. There was a point in time where she had cared about the young man so deeply, she could almost call it love…but after all of this? She didn’t know if that love was dead and buried or lying somewhere deep within the catacombs of her soul – dormant. That was probably what hurt the most.

Right now, in the dark of the Urahara Shop, she felt as if she were losing everything she had come to know and care for in her life. She didn’t have any family who cared about her, and though she did have a few close friends, none of them could take the place of the strawberry boy she had basically grown up with. Losing him would be like losing a part of herself – and that’s exactly what she believed was happening. She was losing Ichigo and, in his place, she was gaining this nightmarish haunt she never asked for all thanks to her new ‘gift’ of sight. Her only saving grace tonight, truly, was the fact that she still had Urahara and the others on her side to help her through this painful situation.

“ ** _It’s been a while, hasn’t it, _______? Nice to see you’re doing well._** ”

All good things, however, must eventually come to an end. Unfortunately for her, this meant that her peace would meet its tragic death in the midst of a storm far more real than the one dancing on the outside.

Sitting up straight and quick in her futon as soon as the mechanical voice reached her ears, the panicked girl jerked her head over to cast her gaze towards the window. On its sill sat the Hollow, his familiarly mocking smirk angled upon his thin lips. The light the moon cast from the window through the rain basked the impostor in a soft glow, almost making him look angelic whereas his shadow – dark and menacing – stretched across the floor of the small room and consumed _______’s form whole right on her futon upon the ground. This time, there was no static to blur her vision. Ichigo’s Hollow neither disappeared nor sputtered in sight – he was a solid being just as real as she was. The urge to scream for Kisuke’s help bubbled up in her gut and nearly forced its way up her throat along with her poor abused heart had it not been for the enormous blade the man soon pulled off his back to aim in her direction.

“Scream,” The play in his voice was gone, replaced with a deathly serious tone and a firm grip on his Zanpakuto’s hilt. “And I’ll skin you alive. Your choice.” His threat was not empty and it did not fall upon deaf ears. The girl, scared as she was, bit down on her tongue as hard as she could with a heavy, miserable whimper echoing from her throat. What was going on?! Wasn’t Ichigo supposed to be with that group the others told her would help him control his Hollow?! Why is he _here a_ nd why is his _Hollow_ the one in control?! Something is wrong! Something is _very, very wrong_!

Too many questions flooded the young girl’s head at once and too little time provided her with the chance to have any of them answered. All she could do was remain stiffened up in her futon, the trembling returning to her as she stared at the Hollow in her fear. If she would call for Kisuke’s help, would he be here quick enough to keep her from dying? Even if he did, would he be able to face this menace without having anything happen to him _or_ Ichigo? What about the others? Tessai, Ururu and Jinta? She didn’t want anything to happen to them, so what was she supposed to do?! Her widened, fearful eyes began to shift between the Hollow looming over her and the door of her room as she desperately tried to come up with a plan, but the gesture did not go unnoticed by the man.

“Do you want to escape?” He questioned her, his mocking smirk widening in his sickest of ways as he gestured to the door with his sword. “Is that what you want? To scurry on over to that old fart and his little friends so they can protect you? Do you _really_ think they can keep you safe?” His eyes narrowed at her silence. “Then go. Run along to your little guards. I’ll even be nice enough to give you a head start. Anything for my **_pet_**.”

Her skin began to crawl at his words, but…out of pure desperation, she actually began to debate his taunting beckon. Should she make a dash for the door and try her luck? Would she even make it far enough to alert the others of what was happening? She didn’t know, but anything would be better and more beneficial to her than just sitting in her futon where he could do whatever he wanted to her. Coming to the conclusion in her mind, their eyes met for a split second, ungodly deep onyx and gold staring deep into her very core. In a rash decision, she abruptly stood to her feet and made a beeline for the door, whimpering as she went. Slipping on the slick woodened panels, she worked quick to find her footing and reached her hand out to push the sliding door open as soon as she got to it, but before her fingers could even brush over it, the Hollow came to block her path with his sword propped up on his back again.

Smashing smackdab into his chest, _______ found herself in a bit of a daze for a few seconds as she tumbled backwards, falling back down to the floor with the sound of heavy, uneven laughter echoing around her. What just happened…? How could he move so fast?

“Did you really think I would make it _that_ easy for you?” He chortled, moving towards the whimpering girl who tried to kick herself away from him. Before she could get very far, he stood himself over her body, a foot on either side of her stomach pressed firmly to the ground. Looming over her, he caught her gaze as it began to fill with tears before he kneeled down on bent knees to meet her expression up close. “You must take me for some kind of a softie or some shit if you think I’d let you escape that quick. Here’s some news for ya, _______, dear,” He hummed to her now that his laughing had died down. As he spoke, he brought one of his hands up to her neck, his boney, cold fingers tracing the marks he had left upon her skin during their first meeting. “I’m not like that horse of mine. He’s always been so soft and mushy…” He made a face of disgust, his blue tongue poking out from between his lips for a moment. “Makes me sick just thinking about it, really.”

Tears began to slide down the sides of her temples as she stared up at the Hollow looming above her in nothing short of pure terror. This right here was unadulterated fear. Staying over in the shop for the night, _______ thought she would be safe. She believed the others would keep her from this demon at all costs, but…it seemed he had more tricks hidden away than they all knew about. Letting out a shuddered, pitiful, quiet cry, she shook her head multiple times in an attempt to shake his hand off of her neck, but she knew it was a wasted effort.

“At least you’re entertaining to watch fight for a hope that’s so close to dying out already. That’s always a lot of fun.” His expression darkened contrary to his tone as his slim fingers wrapped tightly around her already scarred throat. He pushed down on it, squeezing, choking the struggling female beneath him without an ounce of repent in his eyes. “But coming to this lot of yours was a really fucking stupid idea, you know that now, don’t you? I told you I’d come back for you and make you mine, so running to that useless mule wasn’t your brightest moment today.”

Struggling beneath the heartless being above her, _______ tried desperately to claw his hands away from her throat as the air cut off from reaching her lungs. She tried her best to plead with him to release her with words, but all which left her were choked gurgles and labored, fruitless gasps for breath. She could hear her heart hammering in her ears, drumming along to the beat of the rain. Her nails dug into the invader’s pale skin, but they were unable to pierce through his thick shell. No amount of fight she put in resulted in anything that could help her and, as time went on, the room quickly began to grow darker. The Hollow’s shadow grew larger around her body and her lashes began to flutter, threatening to close from the lack of oxygen.

Noticing this, he loosened his hold on the mortal’s throat and finally released her. Where was the fun in coming all this way, after all, if he would mess up and make the girl pass out after just a few short minutes of foreplay? He coldly watched her with a frown on his lips and an eerie calm settled upon him as she began to gasp to regain her breath, her hands reaching up to rub at her sore neck.

“How many times do I have to tell you that nobody will ever be able to help you out of this until you get it through your thick skull?” He questioned her, his words softly and calmly spoken once she somewhat calmed her labored breathing and reset her tearful gaze on him. “Dragging more people into our game is only going to end up getting _them_ killed and _you_ punished. Is that really what you want? Do you want to rush on over to that shithead blonde and co just to watch me hack them to pieces?” His eyes narrowed once more in his gravity.

“ _Do **you** want to be the reason they die?_”

The scared tears turned into full-on sobbing now. The thought of her causing any kind of pain or trouble for the people she had basically deemed as her family being far too much to bear for her already weak heart. Broken and shattered into pieces, the young mortal girl weakly shook her head at the undying poltergeist above her. The sick spark of excitement she could see in his eyes as he marveled at her pain really wasn’t helping, either. “N-n-no…” She sobbed out shakily. Pathetically.

“Then you better start obeying if you don’t want to see something unfortunate happen. I tend to be a little wild when it comes to stuff like that. You know, with the flick of a wrist,” He ran one of his own fingers across his throat. “It would be real easy to make some heads roll. Don’t force my hand, _______. I’m here for **_you_** and I **_will_** slaughter anyone who comes in my way, so don’t go dragging anyone else into this if you don’t want their blood on your hands. I know gaining your sight must be exciting, but don’t let it cloud your better judgement.”

He could tell the hope inside of her heart was dying. Watching her fall apart right underneath him at the mere mention of her beloved friends falling victim to his merciless blade caused for a grin to angle his lips once more, breaking through his intimidating solemnity. He was one step closer to really smashing that innocent brightness to bits, wasn’t he? One might even believe that he already had, but the Hollow knew better than to believe that himself. He had, after all, been watching her for years from within Ichigo. He knew just as much about her as his better half did – and that was enough to assure him that fully destroying her will to fight would require more effort than the one he had already displayed.

Watching her sob so openly underneath him now stirred memories in his head the goody two-shoes inside him brought to light. Ichigo never liked seeing _______ cry and he absolutely detested it whenever he was the cause for it. The thought made the Hollow’s grin widen as the shouts from his better half drowned into static in the back of his mind.

“Now, now,” He cooed at the girl beneath him, one of his hands reaching to cup her cheek and mockingly wipe her tears away with the gentle swipe of his thumb. “No need to cry, my sweet little pet…~ There’s nothing to be afraid of…Things are just going to get a lot worse from here on out, that’s all~” Reaching into his pocket after he had released the sobbing, struggling girl’s cheek, he gave her a tilt of his head with a promising look on his face. “To stop that insistent cryin’ of yours, though, I did go ahead and bring you a little gift on my way over. Aren’t I just the nicest~? I’m an envy to all, really~ I’m sure even Ichigo couldn’t compete with me!” He pulled his hand out from his pocket and held his gift for the Human girl up high enough for her to see in the light from the window.

A thick buckle collar dangled from his pointer finger hooked along its ring.

“Now there’s no doubt,” He hummed as he slipped it around the weak girl’s neck, giddy about how little she was trying to stop him from doing so. Had she finally acknowledged the fact that she really couldn’t do _anything_ to stop him? “This collar will always remind you who you belong to. Isn’t that great, _______?” With the tight clasping of the buckle on the collar, he expected her to agree in her tearful state. He expected her to play along and obey just as he told her to, but to his surprise…that fight of hers he knew would take a little longer to obliterate into dust reared its head.

Grabbing on to the Hollow’s arms in her frail, vulnerable state, _______ shakily met his gaze through her tears again, burrowing her gaze as deeply into his own hellish eyes as she could. “Ichigo, please…d-don’t do this…I-I know you’re still in there somewhere…”

A smirk was all she received in return. A smirk that was long, wide, sick and wicked. How cute was she? Still trying to reach for that better half of his. “I’ve got news for you, _______,” Hooking two of his fingers in between the collar and the Human’s neck, he yanked the girl upwards harshly so their foreheads could press against each other. He stared down sharply into her eyes with a gaze so cold, she wondered how he could even be considered anything else other than the Devil himself.

“ ** _Ichigo isn’t here anymore._** ”

That deathly statement was the last thing to leave the Hollow’s lips before he and the girl vanished from the shop entirely like a pair of phantoms in the night. He left no trace of her nor himself behind in the Urahara Shop, and all of which remained was the quiet disheveled guestroom accompanied by the continuous pouring of the rain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're reading this, first of all, thanks for making it this far! I hope you've enjoyed this two-part fic on Hollow Ichigo!  
> I'm writing this here mainly because I am uncertain of whether I should continue to pursue this as a series or simply leave it with this ominous end, so I'm hoping you - the readers - could give me your input! What do you think? Would you like to see this continued? Or do you like the dark end to this second part? Tell me in the comments! All feedback is appreciated! Much love! God bless! <3 c:


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